Tuesday, September 9, 2008

happy day and life changing discussions

So I had a nice day yesterday. Went to SILs for supper and then to a chipboard album (scrapbook) class with her. She made chicken nuggets (homemade), baby potatoes and cauliflower for supper. I ate less than I would have at home. But was still full. Then we had to race to class. I saw that she LOADED her plate. No problem, she's breastfeeding needs lots of food. It was pretty healthy stuff. But she especially loaded her potatoes, then loaded them with butter and sour cream. ALSO, the cauliflower she made a cheese sauce for. I grabbed mine before the sauce got mixed in so I just have a hint of cheese flavour (cheese whiz is definately not clean eating. It is a weird, man made, chemical product. I do love it on toast though...) Anyway, she also wonders why she's not losing any weight even though she's breast feeding. On top of that, she ate one of those little granola bars that LA weight loss pushes on you. If I was eating like that, I wouldn't be losing weight. Even though apparently she's on plan for her program, she maybe should figure out what works for her, not a generic program that says you can eat that much processed foods and starchy carbs and stuff. Just a thought.

I will admit that by the time I got home at 10:00 I was starting to get hungry. But I often feel a bit hungry when I go to bed, particularly if I stay up too long, then it's time for another meal (every 3 hours right?). I just went to bed instead. And woke up to a pleasant scale sneak peak.

The chipboard class unfortunately was a bit of a waste of money. Just a bit, because it was only $6, but you had to buy your own supplies. The class was nothing more than just covering it in patterned paper and then sanding and inking the edges, so it looked really nice and everything, but it's definately something I could have done at home on my own. They didn't teach anything. And sanding and glueing both sides of every letter in the word FAMILY takes quite a bit of time.

Anyway, tonight I was gonna go out with my girlfriends to a movie, but turns out our insurance people are coming over for the annual visit thing. Boo insurance salespeople! Seems like such a scam doesn't it? I wouldn't have any insurance except for the house but hubby is a big fan of insurance. I was always like "well if you die, why would I need to be rich? It won't make me feel better. If I never have to work again, I think I'd be more depressed and sad." It just seemed kinda weird, like when something horrible and sad happens, you win the lottery. I do understand it when you have kids, and to pay off your mortgage and stuff. But I still don't like it. I can't even keep track of all the different insurances we have now. (accident, critical illness, life, health and dental etc etc. and we live in Canada, free health care?)

But it's also good because I feel like I haven't been home in ages. I really want to clean my house, empty out the garden in case of frosts coming up. (plus then I can make salsa!) do some laundry. Get working on the veil and dress for the wedding. And workout. Very busy.

So the life changing discussions section of todays blog post has to do with babies. I finally heard from my pregnant best friend (who lives in Edmonton and I only see a couple times a year). She's nagging me to have a baby since we always said this fall and it pretty much is this fall. Plus hearing about pregnancy makes me want to. But then visiting kids and babies makes me not want to. I'm still at the stage where I want to be pregnant, but not have kids. ha! Like SIL last night, she left her baby with dad for our class. It was the first time she left her baby with him since she was born, 4.5 months ago! I can't imagine having something tied to me for 4.5 months with no breaks except when we're both sleeping! But hubby has assured me that he will give me weekly Me nights right from the beginning. phew!

But the other thing about having a baby is, I havent' figured any of it out! Like I don't know anything about mat leave, or if we can afford it, we don't have a nest egg saved up for this. Plus we'll have to buy all this furniture and diapers and stuff. Our basement isn't even started yet and I would love to still have a spare bedroom when we convert ours to the nursery, and probably a second bathroom. Not to mention maybe air conditioning, since if this is gonna be the timing, then I'll be nice and preggers in the heat of the summer. But if we do all that, then there goes the money for the baby! Of couse we'd have 9 months to get ready for it and save up and stuff. Still. I feel like instead of just having a baby when we feel like it, we should also get ready for it and plan for it, and we haven't done that part yet.

On top of that, here I am, 5 lbs away from goal. About to say bu-bye to that and have to start all over again after baby. I don't know if I'm really ok with that. It'll be like I dieted down to awesome for SILs wedding and that's it. Granted it should help me stay reasonable with baby and it's not like my eating and exercise will change that much at first (or at all, I'm a big fan of exercising while pregnant!). I dunno, I just like to make lists and plan for big things like this and have a countdown and get ready and I think I just need to do that here.

Sorry for the random thought blabbing there. I think I need to make a list at home with hubby and I'll feel better. Set out a plan to finish the basement, some timelines for saving money and stuff like that. I know I'll stay on the pill until at least SILs wedding, for the off chance it happens right away, I don't want to be all morning sick for the wedding. (plus that's only in 5 weeks! Much too soon to finish a countdown list and get stuff ready!)

9 comments:

Shelley said...

Having a baby is life changing...so if you don't feel ready wait. But I will say, being around other peoples kids is not necessarily a good indicator of how you will feel around your own. Everyone else's kids are much more annoying (even though your kids will drive you crazy)...and if you are like most moms, once you have a baby you won't want to leave it for quite some time...you will fall head over heals in love with your baby and think it is the most wonderful being on earth.

Jen said...

YAY!!!!!!! That is so exciting!!!

I agree that it is totally life changing...but a good life change...and you definitely have to prepare yourself for it!!!

Danny and I are saving our pennies now because it will definitely be pricey having a baby PLUS the big drop in pay with mat leave...

I am sure you will figure it all out though!!! It's so exciting!!!

Christy said...

That IS a huge decision, but I just wanted to say I agree with shelley (above) - don't use other people's kids and how you feel around them as an indicator, there's nothing like having your own child!

And yes, your SIL should be eating differently to try and lose weight, but she's going through a life change and even when I was eating perfectly OP and HEALTHY (i don't eat most prcoessed stuff) I didnt lose a pound until I stopped nursing....

And weekly nights out are important, but sometimes you would rather just stay at home and sleep :)

Candace MacPherson said...

Hey Randi - not sure if you've heard or not, but Mandi had the twins. She still doesn't have decent access and is kinds busy right now, but does check her email.

Sara said...

I think that you should definitely plan it all out - it is who you are as a person and I think the stress would take away from the fun of it all!!

For your SIL - is she nursing and does LA weight loss know if she is b/c she is not supposed to lose more than 1lb a week if she is nursing since when you are breastfeeding you actually are eating for 2!

Way to go on eating by the way!!

Candace MacPherson said...

BTW - My thoughts on having a baby. If we waited until we were ready, no one would ever have babies. And your baby will not be like anyone else's. When the time comes YOURS will be the most precious of all and you will not want to be away from him or her for the first several weeks. These are just a few things I know. And goals - I'm sure you reach yours, but remember that you are awesome whether you reach it before becoming pregnant or not. This is not a race - you competitive creature you.

katieo said...

"Having a baby is life changing...so if you don't feel ready wait. But I will say, being around other peoples kids is not necessarily a good indicator of how you will feel around your own. "

Yeah, shelley's EXACTLY right.

fyi: when we had our oldest we were DIRT poor. We didn't have all the "stuff" everyone thinks you need. We Borrowed a crib and swing, etc. We were still in school, lived in a tiny apartment and were absolutely happy.

Not saying that's the right thing for you...I'm just saying, if it's the right time...stuff will work itself out. If not, well, then give it a couple months and revisit the idea. I really don't believe anyone is actually ready for it - no matter how prepared you are.

And being 5 pounds away from goal...I KNOW that feeling. For me- it was totally worth it and you really do have the rest of your life to "hone" the bod. For me, I never even wanted to lose weight until I had kids, it turned out to be a great break - time away for me.

Dawn Mabry said...

As some people said, if you wait until you think you are 100% ready and you can afford it you will never have kids.

Being a parent is such a blessing but it may not be for you right now and that is fine. Take your time but don't miss out on a wonderful gift of being a mother just b/c you think you can't afford it b/c you will never have enough money.

Get what you can in order then just go for it. I promise you won't be sorry.

Anonymous said...

Being a mother is a Gods gift..its a wonderful experience and gets you more close to your husband and family.Moreover you get a chance to live your childhood again with your baby.